Being down with the kids
When the 2famous.TV crew rolled up in our red Mercedes at this beautiful island in the south of Norway, we pretty much felt like stars. I mean, festivals are usually the place where we can show (and prove to ourselves) that we still got it; that we’re still down with the kids, despite the fact that most of our crew is twice the age of the average population at this festival.
Sure, with age comes wisdom, so we decided not to pin our tent in the middle of the youth camp, where wasted kids give out free hugs, kisses, and whatever to whomever crosses their path, before they collapse in or on the nearest tent that looks vaguely familiar. When they wake up in the afternoon they repeat the previous days’ pattern with impressive precision.
At Hove everybody gets wasted from the moment they wake up, and since no one remembers who they bonded with the previous day, the winning strategy seems to be down with everyone like you’ve known them since 1995 (the year you were born). That’s because it’s unheard of in Norwegian culture to engage in conversation with a stranger unless you’re completely and utterly wasted. That doesn’t seem to be a problem here…
The way we roll
Of course, being famous, or at least 2famous, we made sure that our crew got equipped with “Staff” wristbands, giving us access to pretty much all areas, including the places we’re not really supposed to go with cameras. Later we were told it was a mistake to give us this unlimited access, and that we should have had “Press” wristbands instead, but I don’t think so… that’s not the way we roll. That’s not how we became famous in the Middle East. At other festivals we’ve been walking around with “Artist” bands, claiming to be world leading DJ’s in the highly marginal “Psychedelic Snow Flake Funk” genre.
This is our secret: if you look like a star you’re already halfway there. If you also have a talent, you might be onto something. We at 2famous believe that our talent is to look like we’re famous. We sort of found a loophole in the system there, and there could be no better place than Hove to exploit that loophole.
The fame…Can I handle it?
Having a few people taking a selfie with you is cool, but when the frequency of selfies turns into a continuous flow of wasted kids wanting to have a picture of themselves touching your face it becomes kind of scary. Suddenly I felt like Justin Bieber, and it frightened me. When I was with my crew it was cool, but when I went on my solitary journeys to the bathroom I found myself hiding my face in fear of being drowned by a crowd of teenage fans. What was yesterdays dream became the nightmare of today, but then I realized that I was doing it all wrong! Yes, I was tipsy, but in order to blend with the kids I had to get totally wasted and forget myself.
I don’t remember much of what happened after that.
(Check out our playlist from Hove):
Is Iceland the REAL threat to Europe?
We’re obsessed with putting our eyes on islamofacists, islafists, salafists, and, well, you know, just muslims, but is this where the real threat is coming from?
Everybody: PANIC!Just a few weeks ago our national security was at risk, as someone thought that someone potential... [more]
– No work visa required
If you live in a shithole, you should come to Norway and join the shitfest!
There is a loophole in the strict Norwegian job market, and that loophole can be found right between a grizzlys genitals and it’s tale (also known as its butthole).
Thanks to the low population and the large oil reserves Norway may be the richest country in the world, but if you’re not from... [more]
Here I sit overlooking the rooftops of Oslo while it’s pouring down from the gray sky. It’s that time of the year where all you want to do is to sit inside and drink red wine while being melancholic. I daydream about Lebanon, though Beirut somehow feels like an oriental dream in the distance. It’s so different from where I am right now. It’s almost surreal. But I guess ... [more]
It’s election on Monday, and no one is talking about how much the “Peace Nation” Norway sucks for everyone that’s not in Norway.
I wish I could have talked about something that had something to do with the real world, but I have been living in an isolated bubble for the past week. It’s not my lack of access to the internet that has cut me off, nor is it that I’ve been occupied with setting up the 2famous.TV HQ in Oslo with Knut and Liza. True, I’ve been stressing around decorating my new room so that i... [more]