We’re obsessed with putting our eyes on islamofacists, islafists, salafists, and, well, you know, just muslims, but is this where the real threat is coming from?
Everybody: PANIC!Just a few weeks ago our national security was at risk, as someone thought that someone potentially dangerous might be coming from Syria to Turkey to Norway! It could have been a dangerous scenario if the politicians hadn’t acted so fast and created a state of emergency, making sure that as much panic as possible spread across this Glorious Kingdom. Bold headlines like “How is your municipality protecting YOU!?!” covered the front pages of local newspapers in the most remote villages, while untrained terror police with weapons designed for war marched the streets of our largest cities. It was a great circus, where tons of “suspicious” muslims got ratted on by their paranoid neighbors.
But nothing happened, of course. After a week of hysteria, the police came out with a statement saying that the threat was over. We had once again dodged the invisible bullet, and everybody could go back to their normal lives and start loving their muslim neighbors again… The only damage done was a slightly more segregated society, but no one talked about that.
However, what seems to be more alarming is a little volcanic island called Iceland, which is about to blow the fuck up.
Iceland, a ticking bomb!
I don’t know much about volcanos, but I think that it might be bad news when there is an earthquake every two minutes in one of them. That’s what’s happening in the Bárðarbunga volcano, where there’s been registered almost 3000 earthquakes in the last 72 hours.
In addition, Bárðarbunga is located under one of Europe’s largest glaciers, meaning that an eruption could have apocalyptical consequences for Iceland: Not only will there be an enormous amount of pollution and hot ash rains, but there might also be vast floods and tsunamis swiping over the little island.
For Europe, and the rest of the world for that matter, we might get annoyed with yet another enormous ash cloud paralyzing air traffic, and, consequently, an increase to the global warming that will melt the north pole, which in turn will increase the sea level, which will bring tons of fatal consequences for all of us (like it did for the dinosaurs).But, whatever happens, I hope and pray that the people of Iceland that wish to seek asylum in Norway will do it before they really need it, as the ash in the air will most likely cause severe health problems. Not that it cant be treated, but Norway, the richest country in the world, can simply not afford to receive refugees that needs special medical attention.
That was at least the excuse for defying a UN request to accept 123 Syrians living in a refugee camp in southern Turkey.
Being down with the kids
When the 2famous.TV crew rolled up in our red Mercedes at this beautiful island in the south of Norway, we pretty much felt like stars. I mean, festivals are usually the place where we can show (and prove to ourselves) that we still got it; that we’re still down with the kids, despite the fact that most of our crew is twice the age of the average populat... [more]
– No work visa required
If you live in a shithole, you should come to Norway and join the shitfest!
There is a loophole in the strict Norwegian job market, and that loophole can be found right between a grizzlys genitals and it’s tale (also known as its butthole).
Thanks to the low population and the large oil reserves Norway may be the richest country in the world, but if you’re not from... [more]
Here I sit overlooking the rooftops of Oslo while it’s pouring down from the gray sky. It’s that time of the year where all you want to do is to sit inside and drink red wine while being melancholic. I daydream about Lebanon, though Beirut somehow feels like an oriental dream in the distance. It’s so different from where I am right now. It’s almost surreal. But I guess ... [more]
It’s election on Monday, and no one is talking about how much the “Peace Nation” Norway sucks for everyone that’s not in Norway.
I wish I could have talked about something that had something to do with the real world, but I have been living in an isolated bubble for the past week. It’s not my lack of access to the internet that has cut me off, nor is it that I’ve been occupied with setting up the 2famous.TV HQ in Oslo with Knut and Liza. True, I’ve been stressing around decorating my new room so that i... [more]