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NEWS
At Least Dubai Acknowledges Unconventional Beauty Kicks Tatted Man Out For "Black Magic" More Like He was Too Sexy!

-But Berlin DJ predictably denied into Lebanon for Israeli stamp

You know what, I’m glad the Middle Eastern Gulf region is taking into account all kinds of sexy when it comes to deporting men.

Because the most recent deportee is a 55-year old German man, Rolf Buccholz, internationally known for holding the Guinness World Record in having the most body piercings.

Buchholz flew to Dubai to party it up at Circque le Soir, a club that promises to bring out all the freaks and fantasy fetish stuff, as a paid appearance. But at the Dubai Airport he was denied entry into the Emirate on the account of possibly being a High Priest of the Dark Arts and a practitioner of Black Magic. Yes, that is why he was denied entry, because he looked as sexy as a Black Magic Priest. And yes, I would probably be wooed by him.

That’s why I’m q... [more]

By Adrian
Norway's Most Scandalous Cheese: The Facts, Myths, and Controversies of Brunost

What Is Brown Cheese?

“I just thought the Norwegians packaged peanut butter in a different way, you know, instead of spooning it out of a jar they served it in a block that you slice with a cheese cutter. It still tasted like peanut butter and I ate it on bread with jelly but I didn’t find out it wasn’t even peanut butter until much later.”

Babs, an American expat in Norway chuckled as she told me about her first encounters with Norwegian brunost (brown cheese). She and her Norwegian husband met in Lebanon decades ago where, at the time, he would ship in a huge box of brown cheese to satisfy his homestyle hunger.

Americans compare it to peanut butter; Brits compare it to Marmite; Many others compare it to dulce de leche. But it is none of them.

Norwegian brown cheese is not essentially cheese — it’s made with goat milk, whey, and cream — and boiled for so long that the sugar in the mixture cara... [more]

By Adrian
When Ailin Kissed Lars A Documentary about Kindergarteners in Love

Does this tiny love story reveal the true nature of men and women in relationships?

[SPOILER ALERT: watch video first!]

Norway’s most popular publication, VG, published a short documentary featuring the tumultuous tale of kindergarteners in love. At the most basic level it’s super cute, but the story unravels to reveal the sad and awkward reality of male-female views on dating, no matter the age.

The story opens in the Spring with four-year-old Ailin and five-year-old Lars explaining their budding relationship at an Oslo kindergarten. It’s a love story like many others. Girl likes boy. Boy has no clue what’s going on. Another boy feins interest in girl. Boy suddenly realizes he must have girl. Boy makes girl his girlfriend. They are in love. They talk about moving in together.

Suddenly, fate’s cruel hand whisks the boy away. He’s a year older than Ailin and must start First grade, leaving her behind in kindergarten. She still thinks about Lars fondly but manages to snag a new boyfriend. Lars on the o... [more]

By Layal
Thousands of Norwegians Almost Froze to Death After Accepting Hazardous Facebook Challenge Am I Next?

– How to get your blood pumping in the richest country in the world!

For the past few weeks, my Facebook feed has been flooded with videos of people from the North of Norway throwing themselves into super cold ice water.

The viral Facebook challenge to “Film yourself while you jump into the freezing water and challenge your friends to do the same” exploded causing thousands of people from the north of Norway to look death straight in the eyes as they jumped into the cold sea.

When you fling yourself into the arctic waters, you are entitled to challenge other people to do the same. If they decline the challenge, in most cases they have to buy you alcohol. Alcohol is pretty expensive in Norway, but is it motivation enough to risk your life?

Other challengers encourage the “losers” who don’t do it to donate money to charity. Consequently, it is said that cancer research received more than $30,000 last weekend alone!

The challenges started in the Ferøy Islands in mid April but soon migra... [more]

By @mrmatias
Sick and Tired of Lebanon? But Can't Get a Visa Anywhere Cool? This Could be The Solution For You!

Sick and tired of Lebanon – But can’t get a visa? This could be the solution for you!

If it’s because of the slow internet, the lack of possibilities, the Syrian spillover or the never ending increasing danger of sectarian violence that makes you want to leave Lebanon, this alternative could be YOUR chance to get out of Lebanon and get a “fresh” start, somewhere completely new and different.

Actually this alternative is also an alternative for the people who want, not to just leave Lebanon, but also the whole shithole called Earth. And you’d get to be on TV, perhaps even get Famous.

Not sure if you have guessed it already, but you can go to Mars – the planet! All you have to do is to go into this website, and upload a video of yourself explaining why YOU should be the one to represent humanity in outer space colonization project.

So far only 3 dedi... [more]

By @mrmatias
EXPENSIVE SHIT Get rich on poop in Norway

– No work visa required

If you live in a shithole, you should come to Norway and join the shitfest!

There is a loophole in the strict Norwegian job market, and that loophole can be found right between a grizzlys genitals and it’s tale (also known as its butthole).

Thanks to the low population and the large oil reserves Norway may be the richest country in the world, but if you’re not from Europe and want to earn some of those oil-backed crowns, you either need to have some crazy skills that makes you exceptional on the job market, or you need to go to the forest and put your hands in lukewarm excrements.

Despite the shitty weather a ton of southern europeans come to Norway every year to pick strawberries in the fields or to beg on the streets, but it seems like they might not be informed about the goldmine coming out of the king of the forrest’s asshole: the Norwegian government will pay ... [more]

By Jorgen Evil Ekvoll
Norwegian Culture Shock! Don't Drink if You're Going Drinking

-I have to prove myself every time I go out to a bar here

Heading out to the bar on a Friday night in Oslo? Plan on doing a pub-crawl with your friends? Or just hitting up one or two drinking destinations after a group hangout? Well you better be damned sober if you want to do any of that. Or you better feign soberness as best as you can. And never ever bring up your Beirut days. In Oslo where any beer now costs $15, every single bar has a bouncer, male or female (go equality!) who literally scans you up and down and decides whether you are looking straight and narrow enough to enter.

Let me be clear, I’ve mentioned before that people here get totally sloshed before 9pm on the weekends and I understand this is a way to weed out the waste cases so that the bar is not serving any visibly drunk people. That is smart and socially responsible and probably the law.

But I find it is taken to the extreme here. So much so that hitting... [more]

By Adrian
1 K Migrant Workers DEAD Building the Qatar World Cup! How Important Is Football?

The Qatari Government says this is normal…?

The Guardian reported a few days ago that 500 Indian workers have died while building the World Cup stadium in set for 2022 in Qatar. A few weeks ago they reported that more than 400 Nepali migrant workers have died while making the World Cup possible in the Middle Eastern Emirate. With almost 1000 dead workers from 2 countries, you might ask how many have actually already died if you included the migrant workers from other places, for example Pakistan, the Philippines and Sri Lanka, who make up more than 30% of the workforce.

If these workers were football players, then more than 90 full teams would have already died. That is 3 times as many players who will be starting the World Cup in Brazil this year.

[more]
By @mrmatias
"My Grandmother Did Not Die To Provide Cover For Israelis Murdering Palestinian Grandmothers"

Jewish British MP Sir Gerald Kaufman discussing the situation in Israel!

“Most of my parents’ families – because my parents came here as refugees – most of my parents families were murdered in the Holocaust. When the Germans came to the town from which my mother came in Poland, Stachov, they lined up all the Jews to march to the railway station to be put in cattle-wagons. But for those who were not well enough to march, they killed them on the spot.

And they killed my grandmother who was ill in bed by shooting her in her bed. My grandmother did not die to provide cover for Israelis murdering Palestinian grandmothers.”

Sir Gerald Kaufman discussing the situation in Israel after pointing out that the Israelis are literally getting away with murder. Watch the rest of the interview here:

... [more]
By @mrmatias
Disabled Journalist Forbidden Entry On MEA Plane Because She Did Not Have a Companion

-She has been travelling independently w/ MEA for years!
-With commentary from a new guest poster!

Anything to Declare? Nuts, Fruit, Wheelchairs?

It is not the first time that I’m outraged when tuning into my favorite Arabic soap opera. No, I am not referring to the Syrian-Arabic dubbed Turkish series that have invaded Middle Eastern televisions and Lebanese women’s hearts. In this case, I am referring to the ‘News’.

Living in Lebanon for the past two years, I learned the local way of turning the blind eye to, in a nutshell, bullcrap. To name a few: Former Minister of Youth and Sports calling to investigate Swiss-born Lebanese Jacki Chamoun’s leaked topless photo shoot (three years ago) “because nudity is a misrepresentation of Lebanon;” job advertisements requesting certain genders of certain religions; multiple suicide bombings in Beirut; or even the [more]

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